8 Conversations Every Couple Should Have Before Marriage

1. MONEY

Explore together what your expectations are of money, your uses for it, how you like to save and spend. No answers are wrong, but it's important to avoid surprises (and also conflict) down the road.

2. CHILDREN

With more people choosing to not have children, this is a topic that's no longer a foregone conclusion when a couple marries. Talk about your expectations around when, and if, you'll start a family, how you would approach raising your kids, and what sort of home you would like to build around them.

3. THE FUTURE

What are your goals and visions? How might you support one another in going after them? It's ok to have very different paths ahead, and it's important to identify commonalities and areas you can work at as a team.

4. INTIMACY

Beyond sex, intimacy is the real foundation of a successful relationship. Explore what you'd like together, and how you would like to build on what you have. This is the vulnerable stuff, and it may take some bravery to open up. If you're both willing to deepen your connection, your relationship will only continue to bloom.

5. LOVE LANGUAGES

Discuss how each of you gives and receives love. If there is a difference - and there is likely to be - it can create a feeling of not being loved when it's not given to you in the way or love language you "speak."

6. SEX

The only time that sex becomes an issue in a relationship is when there are differing expectations about how much of it is being had... or isn't. The important thing is to talk about how much of it is normal in your relationship and if you're on the same page, even if it's significantly more or less than is "expected," you're fine. But please have the discussion, because sex waxes and wanes in a long-term relationship.

7. EXPECTATIONS FROM FAMILY RELATIONS

Getting married means you're blending two families, along with their traditions, expectations and dynamics, so it's important to talk about this ahead of time. Define how your new family will celebrate holidays and how you will choose to spend that time. Recognize that you are now a team and a family unit of your own.

8. END OF LIFE

This should be an ongoing discussion, but it's really never too early to learn about your partner's preferences for care if they were very ill. This is something you can speak about with your entire family, actually, and it provides more peace of mind as the sickness and health part of the vows plays out.